Sunday, March 1, 2009

The Couple Bubble

A few days back I commenced a Question Series on Gtalk (Gmail chat software). It was started to instigate discussion on various thoughts that cross many of us every now and then. Overall, it has received very interesting responses. I am glad that many of you have taken interest and have started looking forward to my questions.

As a form mainly of self-reflection and retrospection my first question of the series was, do couples live in a bubble and forget about their friends? 2008 has been a year of growth and fascination with the idea of love. Looking back, I realized many of my friends, myself included, have been under the influence of the couple bubble. I was intrigued to see that every friend of mine currently involved in a relationship took offense to this question and believed it was intended for them. Some food for thought I guess.

Whenever one enters a relationship, a feeling, a feeling stronger than one that can be described in words, blinds him/her. They are surrounded by a jolt of happiness and lose any capacity to reason logically, as they have their whole life. The stronger the relationship gets, the fainter the memory of past life. I can list innumerous positives that the entry of someone in your life brings with it. However, I’d like to discuss one of the absolute shortcomings of it today.

I call it the couple bubble because a relationship brings with it a layer of aloofness. People intertwine their life to such an extent that everything else becomes secondary. Usually nothing so wrong with it, however, when friends take a secondary spot one needs to be reminded of the big picture. Whether a relationship turns into a lifetime commitment or it is cut short due to irreconcilable differences, life is incomplete without friends and poignant when deserted by them.

The end of every relationship, whether for love or friendship, whether a loss or simply a disassociation brings with it a sense of sadness but more importantly a fear of loneliness. Instead of letting that fear guide your life, one needs to use his/her friends while at the same time regain their love, confidence and nurturing. It has to be looked at as a time not to be sorry for oneself, but to provide every happiness and joy to the friends who might have taken the backseat. It is a time to explore and move away from the only thought that surrounds us; the thought of a hollow space created in a very short time. Twenty 0dd years with a loving family, one to two with your counterpart; you be the judge about the non-existent/mistaken hollow space. Honestly, once through such an experience as many of us have already been through and many will certainly in the future, I feel you’ll never desert your friends.

I, for one, will always be there for you. Anytime, anywhere, I am simply a phone call away. If you are currently involved, I hope you do not take this personally. I have no fears of ever being forgotten by any of you. As aforementioned, this is pure hindsight. If you have taken interest in reading through this entry, one very close to my heart, your responses, rebuttals and comments are extremely welcome and desired. Please provide me with another point of view and I’ll gladly incorporate the same in my own thinking. <3


  1. Mohit whatever you have written is very true. It just that when you are in a relationship that person becomes so important to you that everything around you seems secondary..its just a sense of happiness and belonging that you want to give that person..whether the relation is short term or long term, its that time which make you forget everything in your just that how you are able to balance your personal and social life. it is basically sense of understanding which nowdays most of the relationship lacks..each part of the life is very important it just that, you realise it when you loose nnjoy and balance each and every moment in your life so that you can cherish it for your lifetime......keep smiling

  2. Thanks Neha... I love your analysis... When you speak of balancing personal and social life, I feel I have taken more of an approach where I want to make my social life very much my personal life.

    Certainly enjoying every aspect of life. Hope you are doing the same. Wish you the best in the world :)

  3. Heylo again,

    Couple bubble..
    Can one also blame the absolute attention to be a tight catch of a relationship?!?!
    Space.. breathe.. leaves one to be oneself.. let that continue or envisage the bubble blast!


  4. Heylo again,

    That was exactly the intention for the article... If you are in the bubble, understand the space you get and let your partner breathe...

    Absolute attention balanced with a ventilated bubble of sorts in my opinion would be the perfect balance :)

  5. The Couple Bubble should be officially legally banned. Its boring to be sitting outside a couple bubble !